Jokes on Men for Valentines Day

Okay, no hard feelings:-) These are some jokes on men, which we are sure even the men would enjoy! And do not forget
to return to the main jokes page, and read the rules of women ;-).

Jokes on Men

What is the thinnest book in the world?
"What Men Know About Women"
What's the difference between men and government bonds?
Bonds mature
How do you save a man from drowning?
Take your foot off his head
What do men and beer bottles have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up
How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who cares
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
We don't know... it has never happened
What's a man's idea of helping with the housework?
Lifting his leg so you can vacuum
What's the difference between a man and E.T?
E.T. phoned home
What does a man consider a seven course meal?
A hot dog and a six pack of beer
What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted !
What did God say after he created man?
I can do better
What are two reasons men don't mind their own business?
1. No mind 2. No business
What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist
Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal?
He bronzed it
How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy and wearable"
Only a man could buy a $400 car and put a $4000 stereo in it.
Why did God create man?
He needed to practice
Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
When the crew gets lost, at least she will ask for directions